Tuesday, February 07, 2006
I Shall Walk.
How weird it is,That i must take a step back from looking at the world,to look at my life.Friday is O level Results day...I'm...i don't know what to think.For the first time in my life,I don't feel certain.For the first time in my life i am allowing myself to be buffeted around by the winds of change.Uncertainty because,i do not know where i will go next.My life,my future will be decided come friday.What i will choose to do with my life,If i should enter a polytechnic instituition.A hard decision to make in the prematurity of life.If i were to enter a Junior College,well, i have another two years and one major examination to think about it.For the first time, i cannot see what lies ahead.Where my path will be guided.There is no longer the security of a compulsory straight forward path of education.No more thinking just what lies at the end of the year.I have been thrust into a fog.And Lord,guide my feet.
It is a bit like death i suppose.One faces the ultimate unknown,and the meaning of life becomes clear,yet,well,he dies.That mix of anxiety and blunt curiousity.It is maddening.And depressing.Very depressing.I am forced to stand back and re evaluate the question,what would you like to be when you grow up?It seems to have been surreptitously merged with,What is it you would like to do now?
What is it WOULD i like to do now?Well,words have always intrigued me.I would like them to be my life's work.The ability to convey a myriad of complex emotions,Thoughts,actions, with the use of some primitive markings.Such depth lies in it,such mysteries.It is fascinating is it not?Words,i want to make my life's work.Yet,where in this country might i do it?
Mom always said.Don't worry,God will find a way...what else can i do but let the winds of change blow?And allow God to bear me under his wing to safety.
"And Thus,Another Chapter Unfolds.Let it come,I wait in pleasant surprise."-Me.
