Monday, May 30, 2005


Hurtling through the hurdle

Booyakasha!Hey all you cool cats and square squares out there how's the cycedelic keleidescope called life been treating ya?No,i'm not on weed.No,not marijuana too.Okay,Fine let's move on.Really no mood to write today.So i'll skip the Article.Today was 'o' level day.Yes tamil.And no,i did'nt read the dictionary....But i did use alot of proverbs.Lucky there's another chance.Damn cambridge.I never expected the security to be so laxed.It's like one blur dope after another.Well, it did go pretty well,i guess.So i'll end here.Word for the wise,"Ford-Built around the driver."

alone at 6:47 PM

Friday, May 27, 2005


May the force be with Y'all!

Hey Y'all.Pardon the redneck speakin' if ya will.Ah was over at yonder large medow,pickin ma theeth under uncle ben's lean to fer tha last couple...uh..seconds?Dahys?Ya see,Us rednecks are purty bad than whut you booksmart fancy pants call language.Ya see,Am doin this here spokeing to honour one of our redneck pride,Carrie Underwood.For winning that dang 'Merican idol....Okay,you know what,my brain hurts just thinking in that dang accent.Ah hope it ain't permanent.Uh-oh.But seriously how can Carrie UNDERwood win?Bo was soo much cooler and unique.SOOOO much cooler.You know what i'm goin' ta do when ah see miss Carrie?(if she ain't already tending cows.) I'm going to say"Hello Miss CLARKSON." HAH!Take that(not the band.the make me nauseous.)Darn Simon,i thought he was cool too...Tight t-shirted weenie.Well,on to my life.My lack of enthusiasm for writing may seem disconcerting.But i'm all puckerd out from that language called tamil.Eugh..

Sorry for the absence Y'all(I know...i's scaring me too.The accent,that is.) But like i said,it's the tamil..Fine,go be hostile somwhere else. But today was just a blur of swirly letters and useless yapping from the world's first pregnant man.Yes that super uber huge man we all know and love(not scwartzenegger in that....movie...forgot the name.) Ranganathan!Ya.Found out my o level number.So guys,the fated time arrives soon.Let us pray.

So my sister finally forked over her MPthre....(Okay.if SOMEONE finds out about the ...item,I'll be in deep POODOO(cute word.))Ya,so i downloaded this p2p called Areis,Which is really cool.And i bought a whole kitten kabootle of games at russell's pllace the other day.(not his house geniuses,a shop Near his place.)And yea.That's about it i guess.Pretty disturbing from a natural born dreamer eh?I'm tired,so get away.(But come back for next post k?)So yea.

And today's saying is "You must control your drinking."-Genjo Sanzo.

This is the guy that puts the Hey back in HEY YA!Out.

alone at 9:52 PM

Wednesday, May 25, 2005


Under the TUSKan sun,TUSKan raiders.

Did you know that a metre tusk of ivory brings at least a small fortune?Okay,put those elephant hunting rifles down,i'm against poaching(animals,not eggs.I love poached eggs.) I doubt one of them tranquilizers can bring down my sister.Heh.So,three countries in south africa are selling off all stockpiled ivory.Stuff the goverment gets from poaching the poachers(serves them right) and dead elephants(Yes,ivory comes from elephants you twit.)Plus, theres also an ivory amnesty programme where you can donate old ivory products to help those cute,grey,wrinkly big eared mammals(Not your grandmothers!).Elephants are my sisters favourite animal.Well,takes one to know one i guess(No offence...)Also,the head honncho of an elephant herd is not you big scary bull.It's a female called a matriach.Go figure.Girl power,i guess.Elephants also bury their dead.So,elephant graveyards aren't exactly a myth(looks like a job for the myth busters!)I'm also sure you know of the african and indian(these are better in IT support.) elephants.So i hope my little soiree of facts have helped you appreciate the granduer that is the Elephant.Coming up next,MY LIFE.


Samurai 7 is over....SOB.And...and..4 of them died.Kikuyichi got melted...So sad.I have to admit that it was one of the best anime i've seen in a looooong time.It was so emotional.The only other pixels that overwhelmed me with such sadness was Final Fantasy X.Okay,it's making me cry.Today was just tamil,follwed by tamil,then some more tamil and school ended with a dash of,you guessed it,tamil.The same schedule awaits tomorrow.PANIC!!!!O level tamils are next monday!Okay.CALM DOWN.And pray.No point getting so worked up.The class talked the teacher out of social studies remedial.I guess the gift of the gab is a lit student's uhh...gift?(Pun intended.) Mom bought me a t-shirt that has DMX's dog on it.Whose said Moms aren't cool.Straight up tripping Dawg.So,yea.I think i'll end here.Gotta go study tamil.Never in my life would i have imagined in my wildest nightmares to use those words.Okay,got to go gargle with toilet water.

Today's word for the wise(Screw copyright infringement laws!),"May i ask you something entirely non-judgemental?HAVE YOU NO SHAME?-Louis(the drew carey show) on Mr wick dating drew's 18 year old cousin.

Okay,This the guy who puts the nut back in walnut,Paul,Out.

alone at 4:56 PM

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


Meh.Monday blues

I don't really feel like writing today,so i'll skip the usual article.But sorry about yesterday's absence,i went to a electrifying political rally that may change my life forever.No,actually,it was my aunt's house warming party.But the tension was so thick that you could cut it with a butter knife.Did i say cut?More like SAW.So the jedi knights of the light side fled the senetorial council early not wanting to cause an uproar wiith the present sith lapdogs.And flee we did.Anything for keeping the peace.Mace armstrong had to be soothed in his becoming rage to cut down the evil that was the cavernous mouth that was Dark Lord chuckles,the evil piggy.But the food was good.Almost worth the indigestion and diahearr(is that right?) that caused my untimely absence from the Acedemy today.(I missed school,in other words.)So i sit,alone with that wretched beast that is the family dog,waiting for nourishement i gravely need.I wait for the bill payer's return.And no,I'm not delirious due to hunger.I'll end here guys.I dunno, been feeling real depressed of late.Well, see ya.

Today's saying,"If one steals the spotlight,one dethrones a star."-Me(meant literally)

A person in a twisting vortex of shame and dismality,Out.Wait a minnute...It's not monday...

alone at 3:40 PM

Sunday, May 22, 2005


Catch the tiger by its tail...

Let me begin today's post with a story.I'll begin after you people have finished rolling your eyes.(Which reminds me,Nokia is a finnish conglomerate...amazing they aren't into the fishing industry.)So onto the story,if you doubt its credibility,well,it came from the kumars at No.42.And we all know that their word is law.So,Let's begin.

Once there was this british writer(forgot his name) that moved to india innit.So one day he found this tiger cub see?He took it home, and begin caring for it.They had a long and happy friendship,man and beast.The end.Okay,fine,not quite.So the tiger would just roam around the house,and when the limey was writing his stuff,his striped buddy would lick his hand like the cutest dog.Then one day, the brit pricked his finger on some wooden thing,but was unawares of it(don't ask me).Then the tiger as normal licked his hand,and for the first time tasted human blood.So the writer told his friend(A human one) about the incident.The friend,being indian,instinctively overeacted.He told him to put the tiger in a zoo cause the thing already tasted human blood,and it'll gobble him up next.The writer was reluctant about doing so but finally agreed.He would visit the tiger everyday,but one day, he was posted far away to some Godforsaken desert area.He couldn't see his buddy for three years.When he fianlly returned to the zoo,he went to the office to look for the warden to open the cage to reunite him with his predertory friend,but the warden wasn't in,so what this english man does is he takes the key out of the hook and opens the door.There he found his tiger,which he hugged and kissed and told of the horrible journeys he undertook.He cried, and the tears wet the tiger's fur.After he unburdened himself he went back to the office and proceeded to place the key back.The warden stood there, horrified as he told the writer that it was the wrong tiger!

Well,an important lesson is that you should always pay attention to minor details(tiger stripes differ.)Heck,i say stay away from tigers.Now, go back to the passage and read it again.How many times did i use the word lion instead of tiger?Go on.


Done?HAH!Gotcha,none.Waste your time why don't ya?Okay, let's head to my life today.


Today is sunday.Sundays are supposed to be fun.Today just bit.Let's just call him er...THE MORON.Well,he flew into a rage today,nag nag nag...geesh,he could beat an old woman at a nag-off.So,yea.So this sunday,Mr. Funny pants wore......drumroll.....Mercedes Benz Pants!My question,What the hell are those?LUXURY PANTS?Well, yes.Went to west coast to eat.Everyone was in a stinky attitude...And i started reading the Star Wars trilogy.I guess i'll just laze around today.Mr.Ng Khoon Seng talked about the second coming.Every door needs to be open in order for it to happen.All must have the opportunity to know of christ.Hmm..deep stuff.Tomorrow's Vesak day and also HIS birthday(scoff) also got no worry about homework.Ah,Bliss.But am anxious about o level tamil paper that's in like,A WEEK.Lucky there's another chance...But hey,as long as God backs me up...So,i'll stop here today,Need to go and worrry somemore.Must not panic.Stop panicking.WHY ARE YOU PANICKING?
Sorry if i'm a little boring today...Boring day.

And today's saying,"Friends?More like Fiends."-David Schwimmer on working with the cast of Friends.

I put the Star back in Star Wars,this is Darth Victor,(breathes) Out.May the Force be with you.

alone at 4:28 PM

Saturday, May 21, 2005


Safely try to die

Orlando,how i dream of you,it's not all about voodoo,basketball or seafood,it's about ROLLERCOASTERS!(Are you THAT dense?I am talking about the city you know,not that elf guy who strangely looks like beckham for some reason.No, really,one of Beckham's wild hairdos looked like legolas's...Elf fixations...geesh what's next?Hobbit dating shows?)So,the wonderful world of rollercoasters.What's not to love?Flying down some 200 feet above,men screaming(wetting their pants even),women screaming louder,kids crying,old people who try to be young gasping for air(due to heart attacks,siezures,asthma...well,don't blame me if they want to try it!)Ah rollercoasters,Exactly why God forbid man the fruit from the tree of knowledge.Hurtling through the air in a metal tube supported only by metal framework that will ultimately rust and fall apart.Rollercoasters, the true measure of a man.Spins,corkscrews,loop de loops,coup de graces, that's enough to make the slickest coolest dude babble like an idiot and squeal for his mommy.Rollercoasters,near death experiances,in total safety.If you do find yourself in the country which is making Kyoto Protocol supporters pull their hair out,tear their clothes and then burn them in a big bonfire,then vist these places(You do know i'm talking about Canada senior right?The allies,Mother Liberty's land,The red,white and blue?Yea.America,the home of the brave) Cedar point,home to the world's only wooden rollercoaster(who knew trees could be fun?Well at least they don't rust..But what if there was an 'accidental' termite outbreak.....hehehe....) and there's also...Univerasal studios Orlando!Where you can experiance earthquakes,THE twister,alien invasions and fight alongside spiderman,all in the comforts of an uncomfortable cramped coaster like vehicles.And remember Discovery cove,Where you can play with dolphins,those lovable pieces of blubber and rubber!Yes, remember these places when you decide to hit the country with one of the highest murder,suicide and bankrupcy rate,The land of the free!Now, lets look at my day.

Todays Saturday.We all know what that means,Saturday morning cartoons!Yay!So i switched on the T.V and what do i see(heh,i'm a poet and didn't even know it..) pokemon,okay i guess,but haven't you guys at the pokemon company milked enough cash out of this cow?The cow looks anemic!And the flow of the story is the same as,oh i dunno,EVERY OTHER DANG EPISODE!The heroes meet team rocket.They steal pokemon(usually that rat,pikachu) and run off.Some other pokemon attacks their get away hot air balloon and they go "blasting off again!!!!"....Give it a rest guys.Then came the worst part,the show after pokemon.The gransazers.Look at the word again enunciate it slowly and think about how lame that sounds.Gransazers.It's EXACTLY the same as power rangers.Where have all the originality gone?Where's the transformers?WHERE'S THE LOVE?You know those big robots that the power rangers used to have?They're called Ultra Star Gods.Ultra star gods?ULTRA STAR GODS?That's the STUPIDEST fragment of words i have ever heard!There should be a law agianst such stupidity for crying out loud.Yeah,so i was forced to watch this crap(don't ask) and starving cause mom went to pick up Bro from camp.It's the ultimate punishment!I...I..I..think I might be traumatised...So yeah,T.V all the way today.Saturday.Thank heaven for Saturday.Hope you guys had a great time.I won't hold you no longer, go out and stretch youself or something.Don't get piles or something cause of me.
Todays word for the wise..."He can't possibly go to any jail that exists now.My idea was that they build him a fantasy jail like Captain Hook's Pirate Ship cause he's into the whole peter pan thing.-Alice Cooper on prince of pop,Michael Jackson.
Well,keep sanitary y'all.This is the guy who puts the Amp back in swamp,Paul,Out.

alone at 5:17 AM

Friday, May 20, 2005


Of kites and men

Hang-gliding is so cool!Before you give me a sanity questioning look,just think about it, the wind in your hair, the excellent scenery,you entrusting your life, family,hopes and dreams to a really big kite.What a thrill.Speaking about human flying kites, it is speculated that the ancient chinese used it for the first air attacks.They basically straped themselves to giant paper(hopefully two ply) and jumped off a wall.The great wall to be exact.Which is by the way the only man made structure visable from space.If it were storming,...well, let's just say that benjamin frankiln would be tossing in his grave.you just got to love the chinese,kites,gunpowder,pointless warfare,communism,the art of war,mao ze dong...the list goes on...So, gotta try hang gliding.And people have just successfully cloned human stem cells.Well,playing god is one thing,but being him?And all this modern talk about morals,AND civics and moral ed classes,which is actually our time for various other activities.Now you know why singaporean students are so rude...so, back to the cloning,my bet is if the russians get the tecnology,they'll clone lenin,the germans,Hitler,the chinese, Mao ze dong,the indians,gandhi,the scots,william wallace, the brits, diana,the french,the creator of the bagguette,jamaica,bob marly and the americans,elvis,whom they probaby have already started.Well, that's my guess.I say again,messing with what stuff is made of is asking for it.If you see a huge meteor the metric size of the state of florida heading for earth,well, don't say i did'nt warn you.Now, enough doom and gloom,let's head for my life, which is hopefully better.

Did i mention that i made some surprisingly good tasting thai red curry?Yeah, totally cool.Or should i say hot.Well,sorry for the bad joke...Today was SCIENCE DAY!Yes the science exams were today.Physics was quite alright, but chemistry just sucked.The MCQ was okay...So like in the middle of the exam i desperately needed to umm....contribute to NEWATER...So i was quite pleasantly surprised(About as pleasant as you can be when your natural dams were about to, i dunno, EXPPLODE!) when they said i could go, so what my chemistry teacher did was....she FOLLOWED ME!!!Gasp!But i guess she was just following protocol...I wonder if she got raise...So yea, she waited outside(which is a bit pointless because if i wanted to cheat i could do so in the cubicle,DOI.)so, we actually had a chat about the paper(walking down the stairs,not from the toilet...) so it's a bit funny.Heh.Sorry for making you read my lavatorical adventures.And it was NOT my cooking...
So when i decided to meet domingo to go cycling(yes, i can cycle,drop those eyebrows wadi...) so by terms of dicretion, it was SOMEONE'S brilliant idea to go cycling through some GODFORSAKEN dingy, smelly,dog den,kampung village not to mention WET path.You know why? Just to eat some pig organ soup!(just between us guys, if mom finds out, well, i'll be in your next slice of bak qua...)But the good part is that i also visited the St mary of the angels church.It's so....Zenny(zen inclined).Also ate some perfectly soft frozen soft drink popsicles(80 cents!A rip off!The seller could be the next donald trump!) so yeah.Took a civillised path back.Okay, got to go now,fingers hurt from gripping the handles too tightly, legs hurt from paddling up hill,butt hurts from cheap material chair.I so need a new bike...

And today's saying,"When the allies landed on Hiroshima,they did'nt have better weapons than the germans."- the coach from even stevens.

Okay,Booyakasha people!This is the cyclists that put the ball back in ballistics,Paul,Out!

alone at 7:45 PM

Thursday, May 19, 2005


Lead us not to the test but deliver us from evil

Hey guys,how was your potentially great day?Did you make it kinetically great?Pardon the sciency talk, studying for science exams tomorrow.I'm sure you guys know what an urban legend is,don't you just love them?Like a small town in north germany actually drove off their enemies using a cannon.Yea, I know what you're thinking in your twisted twisted little minds, What's this moron babbing about?Any monkey with a brain tumor could destroy stuff with a cannon.Well, this cannon was made from exactly ONE TREE.Yes, you heard me right, a tree cannon.Before you start have those weird thoughts about a leafy tree shooting out cannon balls(i did..)you should watch MYTHBUSTERS! The newest craze to hit the discovery channel.So it's these 2 guys that go around proving urban legends wrong.Their really funny and actually make learning fun!GASP!I know,how can education be fun?All you have to do is blow stuff up!KABOOM!!!WHEEE!!!Definately this show gets paul's one-of-a-kind super supreme extreme whopper,2 thumbs up your nose, mark of excellence!5 stars!Note:Do NOT watch this if blowing items sky high freaks you out.Wuss...

Oh yeah, i just have to relive this moment,it's too funny,happened some time ago...not sure when.Celest points the visualizer at the class at large so that an enlarged image appears on the screen.We hear lit teacher at the door, Celest tries in vain to adjust the visualizer, her enlarged face on the screen.Lit teacher comes in, Celest abandons her quest to right the visualizer and runs away,not knowing that the teacher sees her running away via the visualizer...HAHAHA!!!Okay, now a look at the life of moi.

Today was english exams,felt sorta green all the way!...Well you know how your mind blanks out about what happened at an exam a few hours later,BINGO!Yup, clean as a whistle(have to find out where that stupid saying comes from..) All i can remember is picking up my pen and then....something ...about ...signs... and for paper 2....i'm getting a....river?That's all,everything is static.Sorry if i'm a bit short on writing today,really tired just copied notes like some kind of deranged lunatic with a pen as his only friend. I'll be back,just you watch.Nicholas tried to exocise my writing ability...Yeah,Dumb, i know... But hey, God'll never take away whatever talent,ability,intelligence he gave you.He's like,a really powerful buddy.It sure is nice to have friends at high places,or, as high as it gets.So, yeah.Successfully made thai red curry today, turned out fine.At least i don't feed people BRUNT OFFERINGS, right DAD?Well,really tired now,i think i'll stop.Stay explosive guys!

Today's wise words,"The way of war is the way of deception."-Master sun.Yea, something that is actually WISE...
This is the guy who puts the FAN back in FANATIC,Seacre...Paul,Out!

alone at 9:48 PM

Wednesday, May 18, 2005


Lord of the Blog-The Return of the King

I'm back people!!!And let my fans shout for joy!I have seen the enemy, i have stared down face of evil!I have spit,upon the pimple that is the blemish of the earth!(Well, not really,)And i have survived!Yes, nothing can keep me from my loyal fans, not even iron bonds, not even the torture of being sealed in an icy cave, Not even a subway double meatball sandwhich!!!Okay, fine, maybe the sandwhich.Banned?BANNED?HAH!Paul bounces back like bungee!Speaking of bungee,have you ever heard of BASE jumpers?The next time you see some psycho nutcase try to jump off a really tall building,don't stop him, he might be a base jumper.BASE jumpers jump off lots of stuff, if there's a high point, it attracts them like houseflies to...let's say what NEWATER is made of.So what are they?Some kind of satanists that summon the devil, smoke crack with him and dance around the scripture fire?NO! BASE is actually a cleverly placedd acronym.B=buildings,A=antennea,S=suspension and E=Earth.Basically(pun intended),they jump off these things.Smart,NO!Life threatening,MAYBE!Crazy,HELL YEAH!Someday, i'll be jumping from super high man-made or natural structures and scream my lungs out,my only guarantee of life being a flimsy piece of banana yellow poncho(parachute to you)! WHOOO!What a rush!Sorry mom,you can't stop me!

Well,now that we've got that out of our system, let's proceed to my day, or what i remember of it.

Today was orange and sea blue all the way!There was a lit exam today, mid-year.It went quite well,though i didn't have much time to complete the second part of the questions...The unseen prose confuddled most,Well, your fault if you don't read much.Also today, i played a birthday prank.Due to the graphic nature of that prank, the prankee(who is seemingly in the dark) shall not be mentioned.Yesterday, I bet who would win Miss USA with domingo, he won(curse you Miss north carolina!!!).But seriously, she resembles a bit of plant fossill.Also, remind me to smack my sister when she least expects it(because of the taunts about a certain someone.When wil the voices stop!!!)Had english after the Lit exam...And the english paper is tomorrow.Wish me inspiration and Godspeed guys!Funny,about this same time tomorrow,I'll be writing about my English Exams....and the next days science exams....Time "what finicky buisness..."In twenty years, who knows where i'll be....(base jumping?Ireland?)Which reminds me of an inspirational story about a dancer who made it to one of MR.Flatley's(Notice the respect)
productions.Which reminds me,Please remind me to somehow get feet of flames out the IT room in school,even if it means breaking in.Oh yeah, and had a real controverrsial chat with that P.E teacher, Joseph or something.That american teacher with no thumbs is also a nice guy(not Mr.Thomas, the one at school) he took one look at the tamil paper during the exams and wished me luck.Heh.I shall also not insult my doofyhead sister(paradox inclined).Well, i guess that's all for today....C ya..Note to self,do not allow sister to read sms...

Today's word for the wise,"Two sticks,Double chocolate(on a frozen banana) what is this Mardi Gras?!"-Michael Bluth,Arrested development.
This is the person who brings back the say in sanity, Paul,signing out.

alone at 8:12 PM

Tuesday, May 17, 2005


The names Bond, Paul Bond

Sorry, Can't chat today.My seriously Overbearing sister, also a psychotic nutcase has BANNED me from using the computer, meaning no posts for a while, due to exams...Sorry guys, Beat her up for me okay?Just a note, i had the longest phone conversation yesterday.To be discreet, it was with me, E and O.We invited Q and listened in...That's all i can say for now...I'm really cutting it close by using correct grammer and tense.Okay, i got to go before, SHE aka, you know who comes back.C ya guys, don't be too sad without me okay?Stay crazy!
This is your favourite spy,incognito, on an espionage mission, Paul, signing out!

Word for the wise,"Do not look too deeply at a dot, for in the end, it is but a dot." and also, "They say haste is a folly,but i've never seen wise delay".Thrills are just so COOL!

alone at 6:11 PM

Monday, May 16, 2005


The day of four-Boredom Evermore...

Eustachian tube.No, it not the subway transportation of some long forgotten minority tribal...er...tribe.It's the section of the middle ear that holds air, or fluid, and creates the ideal body pressure.That's the part that is inflamed, throwing me into my trips to CRAZYLAND!!!Well, speaking of crazy land, a tobacco company actually withheld several thousand crates of cigarettes that totaled to some 1.3 million dollars just because they were causing headaches and dizziness to certain smokers, also known as jerks(I know that i just insulted a lot of you guys out there, so i would say sorry but...JERKS!)So, like i was saying, it causes tipsiness(need a word check on that) and yet, over a million people world wide actually die because of smoking!And people are fine with that!Amazing just how extremely idiotic man kind has become.I mean, HELLO PEOPLE,YOU'RE SHORTENING YOUR ALREADY PATHETICLY SHORT LIVES!Well, enough on that.This non-smoking message was brought to you by(duh) me.Remember, cigarettes + you = death.Smoking is a dying art.So, on the world today, NEWSWEEK magazine apologises for the mistakes they made of some interrogators desecration the koran.What is the big deal you ask?Well, those mistakes spawned riots that killed fifteen people!Talk about taking your news seriously...Which reminds me, most people don't know what NEWS means.So let me enlighten you:
N=North
E=East
W=West
S=South

Now, stop slapping yourself for not seeing the obvious, many people make that mistake.Stop crying and get over it!Okay, now, some of you are sad that you're not immortalised in the greatness that is this blog.All, you have to do is affect my life, in the non-violent way of course.Or you can suggest a quote.There.Also my sister did not make me say that the pasta she made yesterday was the most delicious,heavenly,scrumptious piece of paradise on earth.Remember, she did not make me say this.Okay, on to the look at the crater that is my life.


Today i feel dark yellow(is that a color?)(if your in the dark of what i'm saying, check my other posts.)Missed school again today.It was raining really hard this morning, plus, i got the mob boss of all head aches.It's like, John Gotti cutting my brain in half with a machine gun.When i tried to roll, out of bed, as i usually do, i lost balance(this may be due to the rolling or the infection, you all know it as the latter.Kapeesh?)So i just slept(or passed out).When i came to(or woke up),i had breakfast,which is a monumental occasion as i usually don't(but it's more like lunch cause i ate it at about twelve)Please remind me(slap me if you have to) NEVER to patronise Long John Silvers.Their chicken is the size of their crews brain(meant as an insult as it was really small).So, yea. I spent the rest of the day watching crappy day time television. Mom followed sis to get her hair cut.I asked her to buy star wars episode 3(the ps2 game)but they didn't carry it. Can you imagine the nerve!Didn't carry it!What kind of illegal pirated CD shop does carry the latest game even before the movie hits?WELL.There's nothing more to say,and it is pretty long,and i am getting hungry, so i'll stop here.

And today's wise words(word for the wise is copy righted by merriam webster online.Curse them!)is by the old lady from the Kumars At No. 42, Ammi!:

"Why don't they have any indians on the Enterprise(to Patrick Steward aka Cpt.Jean Luke Picard)?Didn't they need IT support?"

HA!Very funny indeed!This is your mob boss victim,Paul, signing out!

alone at 5:17 PM

Sunday, May 15, 2005


Evening Went And Morning came-The Third Day

First up, a big shout out to all y'all reading this(especially my sis's friends,'sup Linda,(mega)Wadi(not meant in any offensive way).), now i can sleep easy knowing that someone is actually interested in my life...Well, on a less depressing note, today's sunday! So?Have you guys kept the Sabbath holy?No wild parties, No "one for the road" pints and NO WORKING! So today, i say SCREW HOMEWORK(if any of my teacher's are reading this, then, HAH! How's that for rebellious?). But, i guess you really can't beat the system, unless you had a really big stick that isn't not bound by any of Singapore's laws or judicial decrees.What i mean is that you can't use branches on the road side to beat the cabinet because they belong to the goverment.Come to think of it, everything belongs to the goverment.They probably even have the rights to clone us!C'mon, have any of you read the constituency?Do we even have one?Hmm...well, sorry if i'm a little political today, its just how i feel.Now, let me post a joke and let's see how many people actually find it funny.It's supposed to be intellectual, so if you understand, than good for you!Here goes:

C:/DOS
C:/DOS/RUN
/RUN/DOS/RUN

Did you get it?Well good for you!Give ourself a pat or a dog treat.HINT HINT.Okay, now that that's over, let' s proceed to a view at my life today!(Polite applause please.)Btw,humans were born with 120 degree vision.

Today i feel...sky blue and grey at the same time..weird eh?(for those who don't know what in blue strawberry flavoured pants i'm talking about, please kindly refer to the earlier posts.)I guess grey because i keep getting reminded of my exams(Thanks MOM...). So, like i was saying, i went to church today(my sister is thankfully becoming a much better driver.Just for fun,can you imagine her as some speeding lunatic behind the wheel?You know, mouth foaming and all...HAH.)So, anyways, at church that controversial pastor spoke again(Mr.Ng Koon Seng).But i guess that todays sermon was quite alright, though he did drag on and on about earth quakes(how they were formed...blah blah,even mom was playing with some baby...).Oh yeah, there's always been this bald guy at church(whom my dad really hates)who wears these weird branded pants.I think i should honour him by stating what pants he wears every week.This week he wore(drumroll please...)MONT BLANC pants!I mean, have you ever seen a pair of mont blanc pants? He should like open a museum or something...Well, enough about branded cloth, for lunch i had chinese carrot cake. I kinda miscalculated the size ofthe five dollar serving and ended up with a HUGE pile of oily, dry,tear your throat to bits, pieces of white carrot flavoured(i think) flour. I also bought a book that gave you tips on taking tests(quite unnessasary, being the genius i am.)But hey, everyone needs to double check riight?(mispelllling intended as pun, other mispelling inntened as double pun.) So, can you believe that we actually drove a whole circle round church before deciding to park there and eat at the place across the road?(DOI!Slap forehead.)Speaking of driving, there was one time when the car neared an amber light.My mom shouted STOP! And my dad shouted(louder) GO! Poor sis!She was completely conplexed and perfused.We did beat the light,but the car made weird noises.So, a lesson learned from this is, NEVER,EVER,FOR EVER NEVER,trust dad.Bro is also booking back in today.He'll probably become more burnt and sticklike next time i see him.Got tuition today too...so much for no work...Well,it's getting pretty long, so i'll end here.Stay crazy!

Finally, today's wise words are from.....Taufiq!No, not the singpore idol, the Choa Chu Kang one!(does anyone have a bucket i can hurl in?)

And Taufiq's gift to the world is:"No expectation,No dissapointment."
Well,not very motivational is it?But whose to argue? Remember, he's never wrong!
This is the greatest chat show host in the cck area,Paul,signing out.

alone at 5:13 PM

Saturday, May 14, 2005


At the peak of ennui-again!

Hello my phantom audience. Did you know that us humans carry more microbes than human cells? A nice tidbit of information to add to your next serious conversation with someone. On the world news today, an earthquake of Richter scale 6.9 had just hit sumatra.Gees, talk about your wild parties.But seriously, they should take a page out of japan's book.No,seriously, i saw a book last time at Kinokuniya that showed how to successfully survive quakes. Their mascot was a spectacled squid for some reason...Well, you just gotta love the japanese.Now, why am i feeding you with such pointless and lame rantings that you'll probably remember because they're pointless and lame? Cause i am really bored!Bored outta my mind!You want to know whats on T.V now? A DOCUMENTARY ON BACTERIA! Which looks exactly like C.S.I...Sorry if my posts are kind of sucky today....It's just a sucky day!ALSO,there seems to be trouble in paradise.By paradise, i mean Hollywood. The Corey-Paula scandal in hitting new heights.If you ask me, i think these people should just be bombed. What's a 52 year old fossil, who had her heyday during the late jurassic period, doing flirting with a 24 year old whiny, dreadlocked weenie,who looks perpetually stoned? What is the world comming to?! Bombed,i tells ya!(Btw, sorry about the updates in this "E! Buzz" like post. There really is nothing much happening today.) Now, on to the section that we all know and love, my life today!Yay!

The colors today are pale green and a bit of grey.And again, i know not what this means, but, hey! whos complaining. Last night, i sent the most number of smses in my life.Some of you might know why. Today, my brother came back from his basic military training.He very much resembles a burnt piece of stick, you know, like some branch struck by lightning.How in the world am i going to survive in the army?I get tired even before i reach the park to actually begin my work out...If anyone would like to donate 3 million dollars to help me get out of national service, you know my e-mail address.Please?I'll be you best friend?

I am so not in the mood for homework. I just feel so....puffttt.If you know what i mean. There's so much writing to be done....geography, literature....essay after essay....well, i say RELAX!Well, there was a big scare last night about the computer. i could'nt get onto the net. It kept saying DNS error,and something at the address bar about starware...Sorry to all the people whom i sent my extremely judgmental SMS too!heh.Ah,yes, two memebers of my class actually pierced their tongues. I remain neutral on the whole matter, but i do tend to be drawn to exhibition art.I don't think I'll ever do it,too many restrictions, but i do salute the brave souls who dare to be different(or is it conform....?).You have to look beyond the superficial levels and gaze at the art that is in these adornments, have an open mind, or say nothing at all, is my view.(I am in no way condoning this action, i know i'm a great guy to listen to,but don't do it cause i say so!) I am feeling better in terms of my condition, so thanks for worrying.Also, i'll be saving some money to buy some stuff, so don't be surprised if you see me climb into one of those filthy smelly buses as you people call it. I do encourage posting comments so please do. I think that i'm bloviating too much, so i'll end here.

Finally, todays wise words come from someone we all know and love, yes, Anand, or as some of you might know him as, ANNAN, blackie, oilspill, volcano dust, etc. And Anand has this to say(told you i'll use it anand,)
"I will never pierce my tongue, OR, get my tongue pierced."
Well,said, bravo, truly one for the record books.I'm your friendly neighbouhood dreamer, Paul Victor, signing out.

alone at 4:10 PM

Friday, May 13, 2005


IT HAS BEGUN!!!

My blog, that is.Hey people,today i begin my voyage into the self absorbing world of blogging!Yay!Why,you ask? Why begin such a waste of internet space on some petty diary that no one would ever read even if it jumped up and bit them on their ignorant backsides? Well, because i can!This blog goes out to show you that no matter how pointless, dumb, pathetic and stupid what you set out to do can be, you should always do it pretending that someone is watching.Stupid advice?Yes, i know, because that's what I do!But really, i learned that you should have pride in your work. For how can others appreciate your work if you do not? You'll be doomed from the start!...Okay fine. I set up this blog on the sole purpose that i was bored okay?You got a problem with that?Now that the introductions are done,let's proceed to the true purpose of blogging, a look at my day!By the way,what a monumental day to start blogging,Friday the 13th!

The color i felt today the most was bright green and yellow. I don't know what that means either but its like ESP or something...i think i'll be adding that into regular blogging.Today, i did not attend school(thus the boredom and the birth of this blog.) The absence is due to the inflammation of my central inner ear,which is throwing me off balance,causing dizzy spells.It's pretty freaky and kinda scary,but like mom says,don't panic.If you can control it, it feels like you had one too many tequilas...but, hey, whos complaining if you get to miss school.I first felt it last friday, but i got really dizzy at english class yesterday.That class which i do not wish to recall..ever!If you're reading this domingo, screw you!Attacking a man who has no will to fight.And its not your fault Celest, so stop worrying.Okay, i shall not bring up that horrid lesson ever again(unless its to pick a fight with domingo.)So,i am feeling kinda jittery because i missed 4 peiods of A.math. I hope i can catch up.Let's see... mom and sis left for little india(i hate that place!they should all be deported!) so i'm stuck with the dog.There's nothing on T.V and i had a big breakfast for brekkie.Not very creative huh?Well,i'll do better next blog.Remind me to update something about michael faltley...and something about birthday presents...and some bios about my friends.

Sigh...everyones getting so worked up bout exams. Seriously, i think that God did'nt create us to get our lives decided by a piece of paper. I can't help but get sucked into the dismal spiral as the mid year paper moves closer.(it's next wednesday you know...)Coupled with my dizzy spells, that really sucks! Now do you see what petty,insignificant lives we live in singapore?Its kinda fun writing in a blog.Its like going public privately, if you know what i mean.Also i have made a commitment to lose weight!Yes it may sound unbeliveable,but it's true!Bao Wen is a true inspiration, though his approach(Run like XIAO(crazy)!!!)may be a bit, well, unorthodox...but, hey the end justifies the means...i guess. Wow, for being stuck for a couple of hours in a boring high rise prison, you really got alot to say.Well, i'll end now, its getting kinda long, i'll update this thing soon okay?Keep in touch o loyal fans.And today's wise words are "If you fall asleep on the bus,you're bound to miss your stop."Oky, i think i'm feeling another dizZy SpELl,sMelL Ya lAteR gU...Y..s hey,Who TUrNed OuT THE ligh......................................................

alone at 3:10 PM